I've cried about it...had to release my 'I'm annoyed with those I perceive as being legalistic' to God...prayed and will continue to pray, specifically that the Bride would be of one mind, HIS mind concerning the issue.
The gist of the argument seems to be that if a person is divorced, they are ineligible to remarry.
If you hold this position, you are affirming:
- Families should be lead by single moms versus a male (step-dad);
- Statistically families should remain at (and sometimes below) poverty level;
- Children should be deprived the benefit of a two parent household;
- Children should be 'shelved' either in daycare centers or indoctrination camps;
- Elderly family members should be 'shelved' into holding centers.
(See the statistics below for details on single mother/father households and income information.)
Additionally, there are a plethora of study resources available, many for free. I use E-Sword. Another resource (a video clip of the author is below) is The Complete Word Study New Testament by Spiros Zodhiates. We are without excuse for not learning and/or knowing what the words are/mean in the original language. Additionally, mood, voice, tense play an important role in deciphering the context of the verses.
The verses I've commonly seen, heard or used about divorce and NOT remarrying are:
Mat 5:31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement:
Mat 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
Mat 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Fornication - G4202 - From G4203; harlotry (including adultery and incest); figuratively idolatry: - fornication.
- G4203 - From G4204; to act the harlot, that is, (literally) indulge unlawful lust (of either sex), or (figuratively) practise idolatry: - commit (fornication).
- G4204 - Feminine of G4205; a strumpet; figuratively an idolater: - harlot, whore.
- G4205 - From πέρνημι pernēmi (to sell; akin to the base of G4097); a (male) prostitute (as venal), that is, (by analogy) a debauchee (libertine): - fornicator, whoremonger.
Fornication can be any type of sexual sin, including those delineated in the OT...not just a 'betrothed woman' whose having relations with someone other than her betrothed.
The Matthew passages cross reference to Deuteronomy 24:1-4:
Deu 24:1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house.
Deu 24:2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife.
Deu 24:3 And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife;
Deu 24:4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee for an inheritance.
Which clearly shows that the woman was not 'unclean' but, rather that she had not found 'favor' any longer in his sight. She, as the INNOCENT party, was free to remarry without any restrictions.
Jesus specifically addresses WHY the woman was put aside, because of the hardness of the man's heart - he had already been looking and possibly touching another woman.
Women in the OT times, without the benefit of a husband (or family to return to) would have been destitute. God, in His infinite mercy and grace, made provision for those who were cast out.
His loving provision is now, in NT times, somehow mitigated and become more stringent for those whose spouses have the same hardness of heart?
The other passage:
Luk 16:18 Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.
Cross referenced to 1 Corinthians 7:10-15:
1Co 7:10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
1Co 7:11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
1Co 7:12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
1Co 7:13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
1Co 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
Bondage - G1402 - From G1401; to enslave (literally or figuratively): - bring into (be under) bondage, X given, become (make) servant.
- G1401 - From G1210; a slave (literally or figuratively, involuntarily or voluntarily; frequently therefore in a qualified sense of subjection or subserviency): - bond (-man), servant.
- G1210 - A primary verb; to bind (in various applications, literally or figuratively): - bind, be in bonds, knit, tie, wind. See also G1163, G1189.
Which is the same word used in the Roman's passage:
Rom 7:1 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he liveth?
Rom 7:2 For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.
Rom 7:3 So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.
Taking 1 Corinthians would clearly indicate that God, in His infinite mercy and grace is STILL making provision for those who have been 'cast out' or whose spouses have chosen to not dwell with them. They are at liberty to remarry.
While researching I found this video series and found it be thought provoking and informative, especially as it relates to the word tenses in how someone could/would be perceived as being in adultery if they remarried.. I would ask that you view the entire series prior to voicing an opinion.
Divorce (Session 1) - Spiros Zodhiates & Wayne Barber
~~~ Statistical Information ~~~
The Single Mother Guide provided some of the statistics below:
Update: As of 2011, 11.7 million families in the US were headed by a single parent, 85.2% of which were headed by a female.1
Update: In 2011, there were 2.3 million women with children under 18 years old who unemployed, according to a recent report from the Labor Department. Single mothers account for more than half — 1.2 million — of the total number of unemployed mothers.
Income: Half of single mother families have an annual income less than $25,000. Median income for single mother families ($24,487) is only one third the median for married couple families ($77,749). Only one third of single mothers receive any child support, and the average amount these mothers receive is only about $300 a month.2
Poverty: Two fifths of single mother families are poor, triple the poverty rate for the rest of the population. Single-mother families are nearly five times as likely to be poor than married-couple families.
The poverty rate for single-mother families is 40.7% compared to 8.8% for married-couple families.3 The majority of poor children are in single mother families with 24% of children now living in such households.4
Less generous income support programs in the U.S. help explain the exceptionally high poverty rate for single mother families in the U.S.6
A few more statistics:
About dot com had some overall figures:
- 69.4% of American children live with both parents
- 23.1% of American children live with their mother only
- 3.4% of American children live with their father only
- 4.1% of American children live with neither parent
Single Parent Magazine had these 6 employment statistics about single parents:
- 79% of custodial single mothers are gainfully employed
- 50% work full time, year round
- 29% work part-time or part-year
- 92% of custodial single fathers are gainfully employed
- 74% work full time, year round
- 18% work part-time or part-year
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